friends…collecting vs. investing

Much is made of immersing oneself in friendships, and I agree wholeheartedly. How one goes about doing so is impacted by one’s childhood and life experiences. Trust is often a contributing factor, as is genuine caring for one another’s well-being.

Just Between Friends

Image via Wikipedia

Making friends and keeping them is easy for some. For others, making friends is easy; keeping them, not so much. And yet for others, making friends is difficult and keeping them is easy. Finally, I am truly sorry for those who find both making and keeping them impossible.

Because of insecurities that have plagued me all my life, a direct result of my mom’s own ongoing struggles, I vaccillate between making friends easily and keeping them, and making friends easily and seeing them drift away.

In discovering my own peace within society’s expectations, I find I don’t need to collect friends…just to ensure that I won’t be alone as the years pass. Rather, I find truly investing in a few, inclusive of my husband and daughter, is enough for me.

I love people, as they are. I don’t expect them to change for me. And I desire the same in return. Trying to meld personalities is not always easy…and I don’t battle for compatibility…not being a fan of confrontation. Too much depletes my spirit…and saddens me.

Investing regularly of self, time, and energy is the only sure-fire way of maintaining relationships. Letting months go by can impact their solidity, especially in times of strife. Opening up to one another, regularly, is the glue.

English: friends like you

Image via Wikipedia

My blogger friends invest as much as they can, given their own lives and responsibilities. So that’s a common understanding amongst us from the get-go. I love when they’re in my life, but understand when they’re not. But when we pick up again…it’s as though we never stopped talking. The admiration and support is still there.

Don’t just collect friends for security…invest in them fully…with your thoughts, your passions, your insecurities, your dreams…and let them do the same with you.

Demanding friends be loyal runs counter to being a friend. Accept friendship as it is offered…when it lapses…be grateful for what it had been…

…cherish the memories…and move forward…knowing that you’ve a wonderful life…and are blest for having had a few moments of someone’s time…i am…

………hugmamma. 😉

Two friends

Image via Wikipedia

8 thoughts on “friends…collecting vs. investing

  1. Pingback: friends?collecting vs. investing ? hugmamma's MIND, BODY and … « fanucupodo

    • Very well said. I think it best if we try to focus upon the good stuff that sticks…and not dwell on the bad…so that we can move forward in our lives. I don’t think of relationships ending, just that they’re changing…and we must change with them. Otherwise, we get stuck in the muck…and we’re standing still…while all else around us proceeds. The clock never stops. Better we make the most of the time we have left and not let negativity take control and dictate our lives…for the rest of our lives. 😉

      hugs, jeanne…for your wisdom… 🙂


  2. Oh hugamamma…that was so beautifully and eloquently written. I am in lockstep with you on this one!! Isn’t it funny when you are an accepting person—you assume that everyone is openhearted and accepting. Many times that melts the heart of the other person unbeknownst to you (unless they mention it).
    I’m so happy you had such lovely times with your husband and daughter over the holidays. my husband, son, and i did too—and i am deeply grateful.


    • I count my blessings…not my omissions. It brings me peace…with whom I am…and what I do have. I try hard not to focus upon what others think I should have…should be. That’s how I enjoy the really lovely moments…of my life…here and now. Yesterday’s memories are wonderful, but today is for making…just as wonderful…new memories. So glad you are happily doing the same. 🙂


hugs for sharing some brief thoughts...and keeping them positive

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