attractive, or irresponsible?

Ynez Sines, the Mexican sports reporter in the midst of an NFL investigation into sexual harassment charges leveled against members of the NY Jets football team, claims she is only a “witness” to the events which occurred in the locker room. Essentially, her tight jeans and white, button-down blouse provoked comments by some players. Having been within earshot, Sines twittered that she was very embarrassed and uncomfortable. Yet she explained on ” Good Morning America” and the “Today Show,” that she didn’t want the situation to become the brouhaha that it has. But now that it has, she is content to leave the matter in the hands of the NFL. Will she rethink how she dresses on the job? No, she wants to remain true to herself, dressing as she pleases.

Sines is entitled to live her life as she wishes. She’s chosen to be a sportscaster, with access to the men’s locker rooms. She’s obviously aware what presses mens’ “buttons,” athletes being no exception. That their testosterone levels are “through the roof” after exiting a game like Roman gladiators of old, should be no surprise. Being the sole woman in an atmosphere heavily laden with male hormones running wild, requires Sines have the impenetrable skin of an armadillo or a rhinoceros. Judging from her appearance, she bears no resemblance to either. She looks more like a fawn, vulnerable.

Many years ago when my daughter was still a student at a performing arts conservatory, my husband and I accompanied a group of young dancers to a dance festival in Utah. Looking forward to the trip with excitement, the teenage girls made plans including what to wear. Twelve years ago, the dress code on airplanes was not as relaxed as it is today. (But definitely more relaxed than a decade earlier.) So my daughter’s announcement that a couple of the 13 and 14 year olds planned to wear short shorts upon take-off, garnered our disapproval.

I explained that the girls would receive unwanted attention from men, whose leering glances would undoubtedly follow the youngsters sashaying their way down the aisle of the aircraft. I’m sure they would have approved if the looks came from attractive boys, but men in business suits? Picturing it, my daughter felt the image was a yucky thought. The dancer who initiated the trip’s provocative dress code eventually left the conservatory, and enrolled in a public school where she was in and out of relationships, seemingly in search of love and security. We were happy to recently learn that she is settled, enjoying marriage and motherhood.

I agree that women should do what they want to do. But I think it wise to consider the realities of life when making choices. If Sines were my daughter, I would be concerned for her safety. Dressing to look beautiful, her explanation, will draw attention, good and bad. Men shouldn’t “cross the line,” but who’s going to stop them? Rapes are reported in the news with regularity. Something snaps in a rapist’s mind, he victimizes a woman, killing her to eradicate his crime, knowing that if he’s caught he’ll most likely serve a life sentence. While that can end life as he knows it, he’s still alive and cared for, until he dies. Unfortunately his victim is gone forever. I wouldn’t want that for Sines. I wouldn’t want that for anyone’s daughter.

A woman can, and should, fight for her rights. I just think she should choose her battles, and life, so she can continue to be an activist for women’s rights.

the right choice, hugs for…hugmamma.

cetaphil, “if it ain’t broke”

A good lesson for all ages, but especially for those getting along in years, like me. I’m sure we all have our beauty secrets, ones that are tried and true and work for us. Why then do we stray, dabbling in the newly touted, the “latest” and “greatest?”

For a few years now I’ve used Cetaphil, purchased at any number of drugstores and large, budget-conscious retail chains, like Costco. I think what steered me towards the product was that it’s “fragrance free.” For some reason I developed a sensitivity to additives. Cetaphil boasts that it’s “non-comedogenic/fragrance free/dermatologist recommended.” It’s not without other “stuff,” but evidently they’re non-detrimental to my skin type. So I cleanse my face with Cetaphil, using a pump dispenser or a soap bar (best for travel),  as well as moisturize with Cetaphil products like 

  • Moisturizing Lotion for All Skin Types – lightweight hydration for everyday use 
  • Daily Facial Moisturizer SPF 15 for All Skin Types – lightweight, non-greasy formula – UVA/UVB protection
  • UVA/UVB Defense SPF 50 Facial Moisturizer for All Skin Types
  • Daily Advance Ultra Hydrating Lotion for Dry, Sensitive Skin – clinically proven to hydrate and protect dry skin for 24 hours

Which moisturizer I use depends upon the level of dryness I’m experiencing, which may be affected by the season, or by the weather in a locale I might be visiting, like Hawaii where it’s humid. Regardless of conditions, whether environmental or health related, Cetaphil has remained constant in keeping my skin soft and appearing youthful. Why then did I decide to try a new product? 

Perhaps the praises rendered by a drugstore clerk, or the desire to “change it up,” or knowing that grapeseed supplements and red wine were healthy, or that the product was developed by a dermatologist, led me to believe that “Merlot” might be even better than Cetaphil. I mean doesn’t it even sound better? “Merlot” conjuring up the image of sultry, smooth, velvety skin; where Cetaphil envisions a scrubbed face, devoid of color and character. Plunking down my money, I took my package of jars home, feeling like a kid at Christmas.

Months later, and skin looking somewhat “leathery” and splotchy, with dry spots on my eyelid, neck and chin, I slowly became disenchanted with “Merlot.” I say slowly, because initially I attributed my problems to eczema from which I’ve suffered most of my life. So I kept piling on the new moisturizer, morning and night. But I couldn’t seem to return to the smooth, even facial appearance of my Cetaphil days. I’d view myself in the mirror, trying to imagine what my skin once looked like. Finally coming out of the “fog,” I turned to Cetaphil for resolution.

Between “cortisone one” to correct the patches of dryness, and a daily Cetaphil regimen, I’m looking like my old, young self again. Hurrah! Lesson learned. “If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.” Now perhaps I can return the partially (more like minuscule-y) used jars of “Merlot,” for a refund, or if Walgreen’s resists, I may just give the items to the salesclerk who so loved it, that I believed her.

hugs for Cetaphil…hugmamma.